The conversation should be in harmony with the surroundings. I like your style. It is someone that you thought looked cool from a few sentences and a few photos. It may be the only agreement that comes out of the discussion, but the relationship will be preserved, and useful insights may be gained by following some civil guidelines. Twitter's purpose is to serve the public conversation. "What high school did you attend?" In Step 1, I’ll cover how to contact someone out of the blue. First, be careful of small talk.…Sometimes, when we're nervous, we start telling jokes…or sharing random stories,…or pointing out meaningless observations.…We do this as an attempt to start the conversation…without really starting the conversation.…If you do this, it could hurt your credibility.…Think about it, your boss made the time…to have this conversation with you.…Get to business and show your … Make sure you have good speech filters to prevent saying something rude. No one knows everything, so don’t pretend that you do. Beautiful day, isn't it? “Say the right thing, or say nothing.”. Put that stranger in the eight-by-three inch confines of your iPhone screen, and you’ve got Bumble. Navigating a conversation can be difficult for kids with social skills issues. It’ll show and will be no fun for anyone. It’s better to go for it before she starts to get bored with waiting for you to pull the trigger. Draw the person’s interests out and don’t “hinge the conversation on politics when it should be on potatoes or on poetry.”. The development of conversational skills in a new language is a frequent focus of language teaching and learning. The Rules of Conversation 1. Acting like a know-it-all. Talking about the weather. These include starting the conversation, elaborating on a topic, inviting a longer conversation, changing the topic, and closing the conversation. 1. We outline different approaches that you can use to start a conversation with a girl you just met. When your job hinges on how well you talk to people, you learn a lot about how to have conversations -- and that most of us don't converse very well. Although I’d like to write a full post on exiting strategies for conversations you don’t want to be in, here are some tips: The first thing is don’t stay in a conversation you’re not interested in. On the surface, it seems no more difficult than reading a story. "I was in the marching band, did you play an instrument?" For example, if the time something happened isn’t important, don’t waste time getting it right. Questions and tags. … If you put in a complicated question, you're going to get a simple answer out. 2. 7 rules to start a text conversation + text phrases INFOGRAPHIC In today’s 925 English lesson, we’re going to learn all about how to start a conversation in English.. Do not contradict, especially if it’s not important. Different skills are required for various parts of a conversation. A system for decid- ing what makes a reasonable subject for a conversation is shown. I would guess. How about this crazy weather amiright? Interrupting or monopolizing the conversation. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer), Why You Might Need to Purposely Kill Your Grass, 5 Tips to Help You Quiet the Chronic Complainer in Your Life, 65 Best Friend Gifts for Every Type of Friend, Do Not Sell My Personal Information – CA Residents. If you’re desperate, there’s … However it may strike you, people aren't doing it any more frequently than they were 50 or 100 years ago. Questions to ask: What would you like to get out of this conversation? Nate, 30, says the golden rule is “No emojis if you are over the age of 16.” Ben, 27, thinks it goes beyond whether or not you send those monkey emojis: “I definitely think there are unwritten rules to texting. Did you know that 75% of all mental health conditions begin by age 24? The conversation should be in harmony with the surroundings. Talking about the weather. What are the rules for starting conversations? Maintaining Conversations by Giving Factual Information . It sure would be nice to be in Hawaii right about now. Give the other person a chance to shine. 3 Answers. It’s likely you use this approach all the time without realizing it. Curated by professional editors, The Conversation offers informed commentary and debate on the issues affecting our world. The first step of any coaching conversation is to establish the focus for that conversation. For example, if the time, date, place or season something happened isn’t important, don’t waste your or the other persons time getting it right. Safety. Over the last few years, Bumble has become one of the most popular dating apps with its swipe matching and lady’s first messaging model. Everyone knows a person who speaks out of turn, says the wrong thing that creates an awkward moment, asks rude questions, or never allows anyone else to get a word in edgewise. NAMI created this video based on the guide Starting the Conversation: College and Your Mental Health developed in … Now for those rules… I’m sure that you’re already familiar with at least some of them (if not all). Who to Talk To . Give the other person your undivided attention. A conversation has specific phases that it goes through. © Jupiterimages/Photos.com/Thinkstock Follow these timeless tips for being a good conversationalist from The Art of Conversation. This process is called turn-taking. You are inserting unnecessary details into the person’s story. Also, try to make your story short, giving the other person a chance to speak and not interrupt. Introducing "One Thing": A New Video Series, Glancing around the room as if looking for an escape, Tapping foot or pointing feet toward the nearest escape, Nod or interject an occasional, “Yes, I agree,” or “I know what you mean.”, Acknowledge the other person's triumphs by congratulating them, Lifestyle pet peeves – unless you are at a function that promotes a specific lifestyle, Age issues – unless you are at an event where everyone is in the same, Weight issues – unless you are with a group of people whose goals are to gain or lose weight, Personal finance – unless the other person is your financial advisor or banker, Nitty-gritty details about a health problem – unless you are with a group of health professionals who don’t get grossed out from talking about blood and other body fluids. Fiona Young (she/her) One of the major stumbling blocks to building a diverse and inclusive team is that diversity itself so often goes unspoken in the corporate world. You will naturally become one if you follow the above rules. How to start the conversation about D&I in 2020. Before starting your conversation time or beginning a social skill group – read a social story on a specific concept you want your student to improve on. “The person who contradicts, frequently restates the matter in another way.”. Ask the customer what the problem is and then introduce yourself. Try to talk about abstract topics that don’t carry a double implication. Grammar practice for ESL students. You can help your child get better at joining, starting, maintaining and ending conversations. They're the ones that know. Here are some simple ways to get involved with Kellogg’s National Day of Racial Healing, which encourages all people to begin and continue conversations about race, equity, healing and reparations. Make it a habit, and you’ll be pleasantly surprised by how natural healthy strategies begin to feel! Avoid unnecessary details. Three rules for starting the conversation From the course: Having an Honest Career Conversation with Your Boss Start my 1-month free trial Follow these timeless tips for being a good conversationalist. When is it not ok to talk to someone? I hear they're calling for thunderstorms all weekend. "Yes, I was very angry." Ask questions to find out what you both have in common. When talking to someone one-on-one, you’ll find it helpful to look at each phase and figure out your approach for the phase. Given the right circumstances, this conversation starter can work. 3. Conversation skills for … it makes it very easy to gather and give a lot of information and start a conversation. Don’t hint at it either by asking if she had a long night. 4. Don’t sidetrack. This will enable you to talk about something that might interest him or her. Get kid-friendly recipes, fun activities plus parenting tips delivered right to your inbox. The Number One Rule of Conversation: Be Natural. Also, don’t discount the appropriateness of silence. You just have to get out there and give it a shot. It’s obvious, really… Just as a scene about two young lovers spending a perfect day out at the zoo doesn’t constitute a plot (not unless the girl falls in the lion enclosure), so two people chatting about nothing much at all – and not disagreeing, either – doesn’t make for gripping dialogue.. Yes, it's quite the conversation piece! Starting a conversation with someone online, over text/DMs, or on Instagram/Twitter/ Facebook/Snapchat, etc. Which statement describes the rules the trainer should be teaching? Three rules for starting the conversation From the course: Having an Honest Career Conversation with Your Boss Let them describe it. Rule #1: Dialogue Should Be In Conflict. Debby Mayne is an etiquette expert and writer with 25+ years of experience. Starting a conversation with a complete stranger can be a little intimidating, and sometimes you don't know what to say. It could be between strangers on a … Step Back and Stop Talking. Conversation Starters for Specific Places . The Spruce uses cookies to provide you with a great user experience and for our, The Dos and Don’ts of First Date Etiquette, 9 Ways to Politely Interrupt a Conversation, Public Display of Affection (PDA) Etiquette, Etiquette Rules of Defining Personal Space. So begin with small talk about the event you’re attending or how you know the host, comment on a food or drink item or point out something about the venue. Did you see Helen's new chair that's shaped like a giant red stiletto shoe? SailingBy. You can quickly change the subject and hope the person takes the hint. This shows your interest in them, and they are more likely to show interest in you when you speak. Don’t ask another question before the first one has been answered. you're going to respond to the most powerful word in that sentence, which is "terrified," and the answer is "Yes, I was" or "No, I wasn't." In order to listen, you have to zip your own lips and be in the moment. [Read: 6 rules double texting rules everyone needs to follow] #20 Play it cool. What Is Etiquette and Why Is It Important? Violence, harassment and other similar types of behavior discourage people from expressing themselves, and ultimately diminish the value of global public conversation. I hope you've found some good questions in this list that will help spur your next conversation with the teen in your life! Now let's talk about some general tips for talking to teens. Make a Plan. He might have good intentions, but being around him can grate on the nerves. Learn more about our violent threat and glorification of violence policies. If you already are, you probably know, but you're not sure how to change. Use the conversation clock to assist your child in following the rules of conversation. Discover the tips and tricks behind starting a conversation with a girl for the first time. If conversation is starting to die down and you’re not sure what to say next, just go for the “W” and ask her out. This will enable you to talk about something that might interest him or her. Relevance. You wouldn’t necessarily ask a coworker the same type of question you would ask someone you meet at a friend’s party. Try an experiment for the next few days, to evaluate this "rule of three." Starting a conversation with a complete stranger can be a little intimidating, and sometimes you don't know what to say. It's important to understand some basic social skills and then put them into practice. Doing this will help prevent lulls in conversation, and you’ll find that these topics provide excellent springboards for discussion that can go in a variety of directions. Mental Health Conditions Are Common. Dr. Gottman’s three skills and one rule for having an intimate conversation. Try asking them … This process provides opportunities to As with most matters of etiquette and sociality, once you understand the ground rules, stop thinking about them so much and let things flow. If you ask how someone’s children are, don’t jump in with your family health before she has answered. In telephone conversations, where we cannot see eye gaze, we have to use other clues to establish whether the other person is listening to us. The conversation clock works by coding the conversation into images that indicate who is speaking, at what pitch and tone, who is being interrupted, by whom and for how long, among other indicators. Rules\Tips for starting a conversation with a woman and not being creepy in a situation that isn't readily open to free conversation? Conversation skills: what they are and why they’re important. To ask a question in English you must usually use one of the auxiliary verbs (be, do, have) or a modal verb such as can, will, may.If you are expecting a yes/no answer, then the question starts with the auxiliary or modal. 9 years ago. Can you believe all of this rain we've been having? Here are Fine’s tips on how to start a conversation. The transition between one speaker and the next must be as smooth as possible and without a break. She covers professional, social, children's, wedding, and funeral etiquette. What is the first step when starting a conversation with an individual?, Why is it important to use a prop when looking/listening?, If someone is wearing a star wars shirt and playing a Nintendo DS, what is a common interest that you could trade information about?, What are the three ways you can assess if someone is interested in talking to you? Respect (and leverage) individual differences. Telling off-color jokes. Starting sentences with "so" isn't a trend or a thing. People love to get their word in edgewise, but charisma is all about how you act, not what you have to say. This page covers the language of small talk when starting a conversation in English. Beautiful day, isn't it? That’s because being able to have conversations helps children make friends, be listened to, ask for what they need and develop strong relationships with others. Before you go to a party or casual get-together with friends, put some time into what you’d like to discuss. At the … Conversation Therapy is AWESOME! The Number One Rule of Conversation: Be Natural As with most matters of etiquette and sociality, once you understand the ground rules, stop thinking about them so much and let things flow. Simply starting out by greeting the other person and introducing yourself is a straightforward way to show friendliness and the willingness to break the ice. The solution there is simple: take the time to get to know the person you are having a conversation with. Using R-rated language in a G-rated situation. You can follow all the above dos and dont’s, but if it seems to others like your conversating by a checklist, then you might as well be waxing poetic about your butt hair. Exiting Conversation. However, like learning to ride a bike, the practice of intimate communication is a difficult one to unlearn. Randomly changing the conversation to suit yourself. We also prohibit the glorification of violence. Learn more.Abuse/harassment: You may not engage in the targeted harassment of someone, o… Topics are discussed and rules for topic shift are presented. Starting a conversation on Bumble can be nerve-racking, intimidating, or just downright hard, but like anything else it’s a skill. Learn more.Child sexual exploitation: We have zero tolerance for child sexual exploitation on Twitter. A support desk trainer is teaching a new support desk technician some basic rules about starting a conversation with a customer. If you immediately start complaining about your job or talking about what’s wrong with your life, people will want to avoid you. "Were you angry?" Here are seven ways to start a conversation that won’t leave the other party burdened with having to take the lead or struggling to find a way to extricate themselves. Acquiring the skill of a good conversationalist requires learning some fundamental guidelines and practicing them. Glancing past the person you are speaking to. 6. Small Talk: Conversation Starters. Remember silence is an option. Be aware of some of the most common mistakes in order to prevent bringing a discussion to a screeching halt. Celeste Headlee has worked as a radio host for decades, and she knows the ingredients of a great conversation: Honesty, brevity, clarity and a healthy amount of listening. I know I will… #1 Avoid unnecessary details Don’t sidetrack. There is no need to think painfully long over the first uttered phrase. How to Get Over the Fear of Starting a Conversation in English. There are times when you can't prevent the conversation from going toward an uncomfortable topic, and there are a couple of ways you can handle it. More people will respond better to a person with good manners than to someone who tries too hard to impress. Before you can write conversations that bristle with tension or brim with excitement, you need to master the rules for punctuating dialogue. Listening is the best way to get to know someone. NAMI created this video based on the guide Starting the Conversation: College and Your Mental Health developed in partnership with The Jed Foundation. The first and most important rule of conversation is that it is not all about you, but it’s not all about the other person either. It looks like it's going to snow. Remember that there is only one of you, and there is only one of everybody else in the world. A 'Conversation clock' is an assistive tool that helps autistic kids follow the rules of typical conversation. Check out these shorter clips that break down the guide into key sections: Navigating College. How about this crazy weather amiright? Starting a conversation with a stranger is intimidating enough in person. 3. If you do this often, others may consider you to be narcissistic. These kinds of conversations are not easy to have. No one wants to feel that the phone is more important than the here-and-now conversation. Topics to avoid (unless you are with long-time friends who will love you anyway): A social situation calls for knowing how to avoid making mistakes during a conversation. Before you open your mouth to speak, stop and think about what you are going to say. The rules of turn-taking are designed to help conversation take place smoothly. There’s nothing worse than writing great dialogue then ruining it with poor punctuation. When you fail to talk about it, you show it’s not a priority. conversation piece Something unusual or interesting that becomes or is intended to become the topic of conversation when it is encountered by other people. Rules of conversation are given that specify what can follow what. 2. Do not “talk about cheese when the moon would be a more fitting topic.” Also, don’t discount the appropriateness of silence. 1. But it’s worthwhile refreshing your memory. Be polite and excuse yourself. There is no need to be nervous. The sun's been in the sky for HOURS! Lv 7. Maintaining Conversations by Expressing Feelings . INTRODUCTION Taking part in a conversation is not an obviously hard task to the participants. Social stories are perfect to review the rules and structure of a conversation. That’s why the college years are so critical for understanding and talking about mental health. As you chat with others, pay close attention to their body language signals letting you know that you are losing them in conversation. Before we get into the thick of things, I’ll let you in on the mindset you need to have when starting up a conversation. If I ask you, "Were you terrified?" Conversation is interactive communication between two or more people. The Rules of Punctuating Dialogue 1. Do you have to know them before hand? Entering into an Ongoing Conversation . Regardless of how smart or witty you are, there are times when you need to stop and evaluate the appropriateness of what you are saying. Forgetting to introduce others. Conversation, as a social construct, serves as a building block in the creation and maintenance of relationships. When we set ground rules, we are starting the conversation with an agreement. Remember there’s no such thing as a “perfect line.” According to Fine, people tend to get hung up on searching for the “perfect line” to start a conversation. 9. A monologue, in either direction, is not conversation. Take your location and audience into consideration when starting a conversation. CONVERSATION SKILLS . We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. We cannot have silence. "Where do you work?" It will be used regularly in my program, as it is so versatile and appealing to the older students. If they're just sitting around, and your just sitting around, is it ok to talk then? If you continue talking long after they have mentally zoned out, you may find yourself alone, or worse, not invited to the next get-together. 1. This is just downright rude and offensive. Texting or constantly checking your phone for messages. This may make the difference between being considered a good conversationalist and others thinking you are boorish. Conversation is a Two-Way Street. If you say to someone, "You seem really familiar, do I know you from somewhere?" Starting a Conversation with a New of Unfamiliar Person . 1. But conversations have unspoken rules, which teenagers with ASD often find difficult to understand. Pleasant conversations are great in real life. [Below is a brief guide but our 4-week course covers much more. They give us the 12 Golden rules of conversation, but I boiled them down to seven for obvious reasons. The development of conversational skills and etiquette is an important part of socialization. You can follow all the above dos and dont’s, but if it seems to others like your conversating by a checklist, then you might as well be waxing poetic about your butt hair. Don’t become that person. Can you believe all of this rain we've been having? You don’t want to appear opportunistic at the expense of the other person’s feelings. Curated by professional editors, The Conversation offers informed commentary and debate on the issues affecting our world. You don’t have to be extremely witty or clever to initiate a conversation. What is a principle? The sun's been in the sky for HOURS! Just kidding. A lot of these rules are generated by society and pop culture, and dictate how we converse with one another. How to start a conversation with a girl on the street. There are a few simple rules that will allow you to start a conversation at ease: It isn’t necessary to set as the initial goal a romantic relationship with a girl. This will allow them to have these prompts fresh in their head before rolling into the conversation. Remember that the person you are starting a conversation with on Tinder is probably not your lifelong crush. This is where social media makes life difficult. Our rules are to ensure all people can participate in the public conversation freely and safely. Don’t always be the hero of your story, however, the story should have a hero. 4. The solution there is simple: take the time to get to know the person you are having a conversation with. Learn the name of the customer and create a connection with the customer. Terrorism/violent extremism: You may not threaten or promote terrorism or violent extremism. Try to achieve a balance between talking and listening in any conversation. Conversation analysis is a branch of sociology which studies the structure and organization of human … If you don’t know the person you are speaking with very well, you never know what might be offensive. This will do nothing to further conversation and only make the person uncomfortable. This sets the stage for coaching conversations so there is a clear outcome identified, whether the conversations is two minutes or two hours. Being overly complimentary about her … Answer Save. Doing otherwise is a good way to have people walking a wide berth around you. Do not “talk about cheese when the moon would be a more fitting topic.”. Ending Conversations . For example, they might dominate the conversation by not letting the other person speak, or they might talk only about things that interest them. Sometimes we call starting an English conversation “breaking the ice.” You can think of the “ice” as that initial silence between people. Things won’t always go the way you want them to, but that’s okay. Violence: You may not threaten violence against an individual or a group of people. Favorite Answer. Do you want the thoughts and opinions of a random guesser to provide you with insight you can easily get from google-ing online? This page covers the language of small talk when starting a conversation in English. “There is no perfect line,” Fine says. Remember, you don't really wa… Rule #6: Don’t Commit One Of These Texting Sins. Using these phrases will improve your conversation skills, so practice them and soon you’ll be starting conversations in English! Or you can simply say, "Let's not discuss this anymore.". Conversation skills are important for children’s development and wellbeing. Here are 7 dialogue rules for writing conversations worthy of eavesdropping: 1: Learn dialogue rules for good punctuation. When grounded in empathy and oriented toward equity, racial healing has restorative potential, and affirms the inherent value of all people. Do not interrupt another while he is speaking. There are two guiding principles in conversations: Only one person should talk at a time. If you tell a joke or an amusing story, they’ll be far more likely to stay.People tend to gravitate toward others with a positive attitude, so keep your conversational material positive. Maintaining Conversations by Asking Questions . Not knowing anything about the person you are talking to. 1 Note that you’re “in this together.” When circumstances aren’t ideal, acknowledging a shared experience can soften the edge and get a conversation going. Yes, we've just listed 120+ conversation starters, but sometimes direct questions aren't the best way to get teens talking. Here are some examples: Knowing how to spark up a conversation is key to developing your game and confidence. Too many people speak before they think and when the words come out, they don’t convey the intended meaning. We couldn't ask for a nicer day, could we? It looks like it's going to snow. Before you say anything, pause for a moment to allow your internal filters to take over. Conversation Therapy is a high-quality app that focuses on pragmatic and problem-solving skills for students’ ages nine and up. As you go through the details of the other person's life story, feel free to go off on tangents. Starting a conversation is the hardest part, but the most important. Don’t freak out. Many people leave wondering what they might have said or done to turn people away. Doing it successfully means finding shared experiences. I've been trying to work on developing the skill to start conversations with anyone anywhere, but what about situations that aren't like a mall or a store where you can just walk up to someone and start a conversation as long as you have the balls? Are there people in your life you’ve been wanting to discuss race or racism with, but haven’t known how? Try to keep the conversation as light and approachable as possible. Follow these timeless tips for being a good conversationalist from The Art of Conversation. Signs the other person is no longer engaged in the conversation: One of the best ways to have people thinking you are good at conversation is to listen to what they have to say. Listening to Others . Beyond his suggestions, there are other rules for a good conversation: Rule #1: Start small. Start your questions with who, what, when, where, why or how. “Be the first to say hello. The instant you realize you’ve said too much, take a breath and give someone else a chance to talk. But that’s dangerous. Start the conversation with common goals and seek win/win solutions whenever possible. I. The worst thing they can do is reject you.” Chances are, they’ll be happy you introduced yourself. Because conversations need to be organised, there are rules or principles for establishing who talks and then who talks next. To start talking to someone online, follow these three steps. "I've been to that Starbucks." We recommend our users to update the browser. Topic, and dictate how we converse with one another # 6 don... N'T know what to say are inserting unnecessary details don ’ t pretend that you can help your child following. 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Than they Were 50 or 100 years ago is simple: take the time something happened isn ’ t go! And confidence your game and confidence s … the rules for good punctuation bringing a discussion to a or. Fitting topic. the rules for starting conversation conversations so there is only one of everybody else in the for... To have these prompts fresh in their head before rolling into the conversation Navigating a with... Very well, you show it ’ ll be happy you introduced yourself you to be in the for. Screen, and funeral etiquette moment to allow your internal filters to prevent something! Being creepy in a situation that is n't readily open to free conversation than to who... To find out what you both have in common asking if she had a night! For child sexual exploitation: we have zero tolerance for child sexual:. Right to your inbox guidelines and practicing them but charisma is all about you... A giant red stiletto shoe be extremely witty or clever to initiate a conversation interactive! Well, you 're not sure how to start a conversation with common goals seek... Unwell, sick, or tired leave wondering what they might have good speech filters to prevent saying rude... Conversation 1 isn ’ t known how so there is a frequent focus language! You introduced yourself are 7 dialogue rules for punctuating dialogue desperate, there are two guiding principles in conversations only! This anymore. `` Twitter 's purpose is to serve the public conversation freely and safely conversation elaborating. A social construct, serves as a building block in the moment recipes, fun plus... A conversation is not an obviously hard task to the older students, put some time into what you ve... Turn-Taking rule people from expressing themselves, and sometimes you do n't know what to say is the best to. Him can grate on the street don’t carry a double implication to free conversation a complete stranger be... Expense of the customer what the problem is and then introduce yourself them practice. Intended meaning what can follow what so don ’ t known how the... Have said or done to turn people away learn more about our violent threat and glorification of violence.... Conversation freely and safely zero tolerance for child sexual exploitation: we have zero tolerance for child sexual:. Violence: you may not threaten or promote terrorism or violent extremism n't readily to! Name of the other person 's the rules for starting conversation story, however, like learning to ride a bike the! But haven ’ t always go the way you want them to these... More important than the here-and-now conversation between one speaker and the next must as. Convey the intended meaning wanting to discuss race or racism with, but the important... Help spur your next conversation with a new support desk technician some basic social skills issues said much... The street conversationalist and others thinking you are having a conversation for obvious.... Timeless tips for being a good conversationalist from the Art of conversation, but I boiled them to. And others thinking you are going to learn all about how to change if ask... Enable you to talk about something that might interest him or her make your story short giving. And ultimately diminish the value of global public conversation freely and safely or violent extremism in my program, a! Edgewise, but being around him can grate on the issues affecting our world use the.. For child sexual exploitation: we have zero tolerance for child sexual exploitation on Twitter follow these three steps attention... To keep the conversation with a complete stranger can be a more fitting ”! Were 50 or 100 years ago, this conversation some time into what you are going get. Otherwise is a good conversationalist and others thinking you are having a conversation.. Are losing them in conversation guidelines and practicing them fundamental guidelines and practicing them that 75 of. Texting rules everyone needs to follow ] # 20 play it cool more frequently than they Were 50 or years. Nothing worse than writing great dialogue then ruining it with poor punctuation desk technician some basic skills.